Another totally stupid "Costume Contest" @ corporate America's office. I took advantage of the situation and wore my most ridiculous pajamas to work with my big fluffy bath robe. I've been comfy cozy all day and when people ask what I'm supposed to be, I have several replies, "a desperate housewife" or "late for work." They made us march around for the judging. I grabbed my cup of coffee and took repeated swallows to keep my muttering to my self as I thought, "f-you, f-you and while I'm at it, f-you too lady." One of the pluses was that I didn't have to waste any energy or time getting ready for work this morning. All I had to do was literally roll out of bed and slip on some sneakers and my bathrobe. I felt totally ridiculous driving to work because I didn't see ANYONE else dressed up for Halloween! There I was driving like a bat outa hell, doing 80 mph in my pink bathrobe in my Taurus. I must've been a sight to see. Which brings me to a very funny Halloween tale. I must've been about 9 or 10 years old. For 2 consecutive years, my sister and our friends dressed up as punk rockers. My family was gathered around in the living room and my father casually inquired, "what are you guys gonna be for Halloween? Don't say 'a punk-rocker'. You guys did that 2 years in a row." My father has always been a big kid. Take breakfast cereals for an example. My sister and I weren't confined to eating plain old Rice Krispies or bland Cheerios. Nope, we ate Captain Crunch or Dig 'Em Smacks or Fruity Pebbles. My dad was always in charge of picking out the cereals. Anyway, my dad has always really been into Halloween. He's always helped us from doing our make-up (the year I dressed as a Samuri, utilizing a Korean smoking jacket with crazy kabuki theatre make-up) to helping sewing/creating our costumes. He even sewed our giant Christmas stockings that my mother still insists on hanging up. So, when he asked what we were gonna be for Halloween that year, I thought about it for a bit. I was trying to be creative. I knew I wanted to wear fishnet pantyhose, mini skirt, lots of make-up, Lee Press-On Nails, high heels, and maybe a crazy Tina Turner wig. "I've got it," I thought to myself. I say outloud, "um, I think this year dad, I wanna be a HOOKER. Yeah, that sounds cool." I thought my father was gonna pass out. I really didn't know what a hooker was or what they did, I just knew that they got to wear cool outfits all the time and all the guys thought they were hot. As my father completes his double take and picks his jaw up off of the ground, he asks, "why on Earth would you wanna be that? Why did you say that? Where did you hear about that?" I got the "who-what-when-where-how?" I had no clue, it must've been something I had seen on TJ Hooker or Magnum PI. Maybe this year for Halloween, I'll borrow my friend's dress and go to Walgreens to shoplift.

This was me when I woke up this morning. It was so cold. Our (my roommate and I) gas was shut off a few months back and won't be back on until sometime in November. You should've seen the sexy pajamas I wore to bed last night!




1. Polar fleece pj pants
2. Long sleeved t-shirt
3. Puffy/fuzzy polar fleece sox
4. Sexy one piece neck to floor ensemble my ex's mother gave me one year for Christmas. I think she was trying to eliminate the possibility of me ever having sex with him again.
5. Hooded sweatshirt
6. Goose down comforter

Yep, it was cold. I guess I should take the air conditioner out of my window. That might be letting in a few drafts. I swear, I felt like Linda Blair from the Exorcist this morning, I could damn near see my breath!

OK, so here's the story. A friend of my roommate's borrowed a dress from her the other night (it was a black leather short dress with zippers up the sides). Not really my cup o' tea, but to each their own.
She stopped in Walgreens with a girlfriend (girlfriend as in female friend, not life partner) to schlep around. She was stopped by a security guard for suspicion of shoplifting. The security guard proceeded to take her aside and damned near strip search her. In reality, this guy had no right to do what he did. There should've been a female guard searching her. This sleeze then unzipped this girl's dress (zippers up both sides running the length of the dress) and the dress began to fall off. So, there she is, mortified while holding up the front of the dress against her. The guard: one hand on her ass, one hand on her very large chest. Then the cherry on the top....he says, "I pay very well. How much do you charge?" He had mistaken her for a lady of the night, a street walker if you will. Yes, he thought she was a HOOKER. At this point, she should've knocked his lights out. She tries to keep what little dignity she had left and said, "WTF!!! I'm not a prostitute!" The rent-o-cop says, "...oh. OK, so then can I get your number?" What a friggin' dirtbag!!!

I haven't posted in a while 'cause life has been painfully mundane. I did, however, have the pleasure of watching a friend dump his bike over.....twice. I will omit names to save face. I didn't laugh when it happened, so now I'm giggling like a school girl, behind his back. God, was I embarrassed FOR him. Poor little guy was too drunk and too short to hold up his big Harley Road King. I've been riding for about 4 years now, and *knock on wood* I haven't had an incident. Must be like they say, "This Bitch Don't Fall Off!"